


A Fate Worse Than Death

by FortunesRevolver



Category: Rockman.EXE | Mega Man Battle Network
Genre: M/M, Spoilers for Rockman Axess
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-27
Updated: 2015-07-27
Packaged: 2018-04-11 11:56:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,998
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4434578
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FortunesRevolver/pseuds/FortunesRevolver
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After seeing so many fall to the clutches of the Darkchips, none of them ever imagined they'd be mourning a friend. It's a difficult process to stand up after losing someone you cherish, but all that's left is to pick up the pieces as you try to move forward. Sometimes, a shoulder to lean on just isn't enough.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A Fate Worse Than Death

The rush of strength throws Blues off as he suddenly finds himself on his feet, lighter than ever. He can feel the strange new power rushing through him, making his once fatigued movements fluid and quicker than ever as he brings his sword down on Shademan hard. Thoughts and feelings are running through his mind all too quickly and he doubles over, the newfound feeling of strength overwhelming him.

A voice hisses at him from the back of his mind, urging him to submit, to give in and let his mind fall freely to the power of darkness. It’s a struggle, and the more he tries to ignore it, the louder the voice gets. He can hear Rockman’s panicked voice calling out to him and he takes a step backward, throwing his sword up to keep distance between them. _Rip, tear, cut, slash… Delete... Delete him!_  

 _Shut up!_ He tries to ignore it, to shut the voice out and feels his legs weaken. Pain is clawing at the edges of his programming, and his falls to his knee, trembling with the effort to keep it all at bay. Rockman’s voice grows more frantic still, but his arm hurts too much to threaten him with it again. He is losing himself, fumbling desperately to keep hold on the control he has always prided himself on and he knows it won’t last long. He’s seen how quickly other navi have succumbed to the dark aura and knows he won’t last long.

It’s a moot effort, and Blues knows it, but he tries anyway. He pleads for Rockman to delete him, to end the suffering he can see but not feel. Deletion seems kinder than the alternative, but he is well aware that the blue navi beside him is too gentle and too kind to ever end the life of a friend. Not if he thinks there might be another way out, but Blues can’t see the fork in this road. There’s just one path and it’s leading into the depths of something he knows he won’t be able to escape. He doesn’t want to hurt Rockman  or – _Enzan!_

The face of his operator flashes across his mind and the voice screeches in protest as the sudden clarity gives him the strength to speak. For so long, Enzan has never had anyone but Blues to call his own, his family, his _friend_ and he says the only thing he can think of to offer comfort in a strained tone.

He’d sooner face deletion a thousand times over than cause Enzan anymore pain than his life has already forced upon him.

He can hear the strangled response, Enzan’s voice is trembling as much almost as much as he is and he knows he’s already failed. Beside him, Rockman’s panicked voice fills his ears and he tries to focus on the hand touching his back. His vision is beginning to blur and the voice has grown all the louder. Every bit of data, every memory, thought, and feeling that has made him who he is begins to crumble under the strain of the fight.

His hope is running thin, but a sudden warmth engulfs him as a glow emits from both their chests. He’s seen the light before, and his eyes widen behind his visor. For a brief, brief moment, the voice is silenced and all he can feel is the gentle comfort of his most trusted digital comrade. It almost brings back his hope. He opens his mouth to speak, but he is suddenly thrown to the ground as Rockman screams in agony. Before he can think, the crushing agony is tearing at his mind again and the voice is suddenly screaming. With a trembling hand, he presses his fingers to his chest, taking in the faint, lingering feeling of comfort.

 _My power, my hope, my feelings… Rockman, everything that I still have… take it!_ His own data feels foreign between his fingers and he thrust it forward before the voice can stop him. If he is going to be lost, then he’ll give every last bit of himself he can still feel to the one person he knows he can trust with it.

As he raises his head a final time, Rockman stands not far away, boasting his own signature red with a fiery determination in his eyes. He knows they’ve made the right choice and feels himself being dragged downward.

 _“It’s nice to meet you. My name is Blues.”_ He can see a small, pale face with innocent blue eyes peering down at him. “ _I will follow through with any of your orders, Enzan-sama._ ”

He can see the beginnings of a hesitant smile as the child speaks. “ _Then…  you’ll always be with me?”_ He hears the hope in the young voice and he smiles in return with a nod.

 _“I would be honoured.”_ The look he receives is the brightest he’s ever seen, and he can hear the same feeling reflected in the voice that responds to him.

 _“Thank you, Blues…!”_ That smile, that boy, he knows immediately, he wants to protect. To preserve the childlike happiness and ensure that this boy is never left alone again. He swears to always stay by his side.

 _Enzan-sama…_ He can hear someone screaming his name, but it’s too far away to make out. _I’m sorry…_

 And everything goes dark.


	2. Through the Looking Glass

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Like watching himself through a window, Blues is powerless against the darkness that continues to press in ever closer. He's a marionette; a shell of his formal self bent to the will of the chip that stole him away. All he can do is pray that maybe, just maybe, someone will finally put an end to him, and he might be forgiven for all he's done.

When Blues finally comes to, he feels as if he’s a spectator within his own body. He can see and feel everything that happens around him, but every cry, every protest he makes falls on deaf ears. He screams and shouts and struggles, fighting against something he can’t feel or see in a desperate attempt to regain control of his body, but his own words sound as if they’re coming from miles away. His limbs won’t respond to his commands, but he watches them move as if he has suddenly become the marionette of a sadistic puppeteer.

He can feel himself travelling through the net, slipping gracefully between links and webpages with ease. Firewalls are no match for his well-trained body and whatever is controlling him is well aware of it. Viruses and security navi alike are slain and knocked aside without a second thought, and he can do nothing to stop his own sword from dealing their fate. He wants to close his eyes, to turn away from the monster he’s become, but he doesn’t have the control to do it.

Without warning, he feels himself pulled through another link and he can hear the sound of human voices. Startled, Blues takes in the dark room around him and tries to understand what’s going on. He hasn’t seen humans in a few days. The Darkloid’s don’t seem to think highly of them.

A hologram hums into life and suddenly the room is illuminated and he feels something inside of him twist. _“I dropped by to give my greetings,”_ his own voice begins to speak and he panics, eyes wide as he finds himself struggling to stop the words.

 _“Blues!”_  

 _“Don’t address me so warmly!”_ His struggles become more frantic as the darkness around him presses closer and tries to stop him from fighting back.

 _Leave him alone!_ He tries to shout, but the words are as effective as if he’d spoken from underwater. _Enzan-sama!_ He strains and tugs and fights, but it’s all in vain, and Blues is forced to stare into the face he’s watched over for so long. He sees the hurt, the betrayal, the confusion, the loss, the guilt…

_“I am not the Blues I was before.”_

Suddenly he’s staring into the eyes of the scared and lonely child he’d met so many years ago. The child he’d sworn to protect and follow, no matter what his decisions, and stand in place of father who was never there and far too heartless to ever deserve the title.

Every word his voice says makes the look on Enzan’s face grow more strained, and with it, his chest tightens just a little more. He hates the darkchips, the dark aura, the Darkloids, all of them more then ever. Most of all, he hates himself for being too weak to fight; for breaking the one promise he swore on every bit of data that he was to never break.

_“Farewell, Enzan.”_

The room around him disappears as his body is pulled backward and out of the small homepage for the wearable computer. He wants to stay, to remain stationary even if he cannot speak or move. Seeing Enzan, seeing him safe is a small comfort but it’s all Blues has to cling to. As his senses begin to dull, he can hear the ever familiar voice of his operator calling out to him before darkness is all he knows.

*** 

The next time Blues sees Enzan, they are face-to-face, looking out the screen he once diligently stood behind as his operator worked. His chest, his entire body, things he can’t name lurch in agony as he sees the look of angry defiance on the boy’s young face. Yet in his pain, he is so incredibly proud; Enzan has not given up, Enzan is still fighting back, even against him, and Blues is so proud.

He almost feels as if it’s going to be alright; that things will be find again. The voice is screeching protest in his mind, howling against the sudden rush of warmth and happiness he feels toward his operator for being so strong. He doesn’t realise he has spoken until he hears his voice; it’s gentler than the snide and mocking tone he’s heard for the past few days.

_“Enzan…”_

For a brief, brief moment, he sees realisation flash across Enzan’s eyes before his gaze is hard again. Blues can’t blame him; he barely believes it himself. He wants to speak, to say so many things. To apologise. He wants to assure his operator that it will all be alright, that he’ll make it through this, but before he can even formulate a thought, his consciousness is thrust backward and suddenly he is behind the invisible window again.

_No!_

_“It won’t go like this next time.”_

Despite the direction of the words, Blues can’t help but think they are a warning for more than just Enzan.

*** 

_“I apologise for my failure…”_

It’s the only satisfaction Blues has had in days. He can feel the shame of the force controlling his body and he wishes he could celebrate. They’ve failed, and he has never been more pleased to face failure in his life. The data is safe, Enzan is safe, and the Darkloids aren’t getting what they want.

 _“Don’t worry about it.”_   Laserman’s words shock both Blues and the darkness controlling him. He should be angry. He should be dealing punishment, just as he’s seen dealt to failures before. Deletion, he thinks, is not optimal, but he knows that Enzan has not given up and that is enough for him. Enough that his situation can offer. _“You are, after all, an important experiment.”_

Before he can make sense of the words, Blues screams as agony rips through his body once more. It feels as if he’s being crushed and ripped apart all at once. Every sense that he was able to cling to feels as if it’s being shut down, torn away from his weak grasp and for the first time, he truly feels terror.

Ņ̢͝o͡͞!́͜

The darkness is crushing, suffocating, pulling him under a dark pool of nothingness as the agony renders his limbs too numb to fight back.

͘H͞è͘͟lp ̛͢m͢e̵̛…̴

He can’t see any longer, it’s all black, black, black.

̛͢I̵̡t̡̨́ ̢͡h̨̀u͜͏͡r̢̧t̀̀̕s…͏

Everything, _everything_ is in agony and he feels himself falling apart again and again.

̛͍̘͔͟͝E̸̢̧n͏̸z̛͝a̸͝ń̨͏-s̨͢a̴m҉á͟…͞͞

He struggles, desperately trying to cling to something, but the effort is pointless and the truth of that is enough to finally break him.

He won’t be able to keep his promise after all.

̸̰̦͕͚͉̘̖̼̻͎̥̻̮͎͖ͅI̴’m̵̡͟ ̸̧́so ̴sor̡͜ry…̛͟


End file.
